Sunday 22 May 2011

10 Reasons to Use Online Dating Sites

There are many more reasons than just ten that I would like to mention, but in this article I have focussed on the primary ten reasons why I believe on-line dating is here to stay. It is now understood that the industry has even further to grow as more and more service suppliers in this segment realize the many niches yet to be serviced and explored. If you are concerned about your time, privacy or safety, while using On-line Dating, then this is a 'must read'.

1.Most people are pretty busy these days. You can imagine how many times you would have to go out and socialize before finding the right partner. Then consider how much you end up spending week after week. You may meet the right person the first time you go out, but you and I know that this is highly unlikely. This procedure more often than not ends up in a lot of wasted time and a lot of wasted money too. However, dating sites(in general) cost nothing to register and or search.


2.Dating sites (the good ones) are in the main, free to join. Only costing you money when you have linked up with someone and intend on meeting with them or communicating further. This is a great feature because it means you will be aware of the basic geography, the hobbies, nuances, hobbies, and other interests before you meet. This is so much less time consuming than dating different people over and over before you find that 'right' person or even just the essential pieces of information.


3.From time to time you can also place advertisements on these sites which stimulates response and gives you a wider field to choose from.


4.You can remain anonymous (recommended) and protect your identity until you're ready and comfortable enough to disclose who you reallly are. If you decide the other person is not for you, you can easily and tactfully end communication without any animosity or even further contact.


5.Some people moving to a new location like to establish relationships and friend before they arrive at their new abode, allowing settling in to be that much easier. This is very often relevant to single parents. There are sites out there that are specific to single parents dating which make the job of meeting that much easier.


6.You may be having difficulty meeting people of the same faith or religion. In this case, there are niche dating sites that service this need in almost every major religion or faith.


7.Equally important is the need to service alternative dating requirements for those who seek pursuits outside the mainstream world of dating. There are many sites to choose from in this category to a point where choosing a good alternative dating service can become confusing and almost frustrating. Look for a Dating Site Review Service to assist you with this. Most of these service sites will have carried out some reviews in addition to weeding out the good from the not so good. If you don't find a particular site on a dating site review service it usually means the owners were uncomfortable with the site and will not include it in their pages or they haven't got around to reviewing it as yet - If the latter is the case, send them an email asking them to review that particular site. Most will follow through and you will find a review in as little as a few days in some cases. If it does not turn up on their pages, there could be something wrong with it.


8.Adult dating also falls into the above category due to its large following. Fortunately, the same solution applies. Just find a dating site review service that has done the 'hard yards' on your behalf and click away. The good review sites are free and will guide you to the better service suppliers.


9.On the subject of Dating Site Review Services, some of them supply newsletters which keep you informed and up to date on new services, promotions (ie.Romance Tours, Dating Events and Speed Dating etc.) and of course other exciting freebies. It is always worth subscribing because you can always unsubscribe if you want to. Just make sure they mention that in their 'sign up box'. Some independent sites have their own newsletters but common sense tells you that you are more likely to receive a more diverse range of information and promotions from the Dating Site Review Service than from just one independent dating site. This occurs because they will screen a whole swag of offers from a host of sites rather than just one before they onsend them to you.


10.Another cool free service from responsible dating sites and review services are the articles which frequently guide you in the right direction with dating trends and tips for successful dating and romance.


I hope this article has opened you eyes to just a few of the many benefits and features that can be obtained when using dating sites to help you.
Enjoy!

When it comes to Multicultural Dating The Most Important Ingredient is Love

Have you been only dating people from your own ethnic background, to find that no matter what you try, there just seems to be no spark or real passion occurring in the relationship? Are you just about ready to give up on finding a soul mate? Well before you lose all hope in the dating world, you may want to try exploring dating someone who comes from a different culture than you. Who knows, you may just discover that a multicultural relationship is what you need to discover that special spark you've been searching for.

One of the best ways that you can explore your dating options, without having to worry about pressures from friends or family, is to join an online dating community, such as Love Empire, which is designed to bring you close to those who share the same interests as you, regardless if they are black, white, Eurasian and so on.

Love Empire allows you the chance to really explore the beauty of the multicultural dating world with no strings attached, and no outside judgments interfering with your choices. In this online dating community the only opinion that matters when it comes to dating is your own. Therefore, listen to you heart, trust your feelings and use your common sense to decide what's best for you. Besides, the whole point to dating is to have fun, and to enjoy the company of the person you choose to be with.

There is true potential in being apart of a multicultural relationship in today's society, as these relations have really become a more common and accepted part of Western culture. Because of this, blacks, whites, Eurasians and other ethnic groups have more reason to mix together than any other time in history. For instance, it has been estimated that in Britain alone, over 30 percent of black men are either living with or are married to white women, and over 20 percent of black women are living with or married to white men. When you stop to think about that, it's truly beautiful to know that something such as multicultural relationships has grown from a small minority and become common and socially recognized.

Don't be afraid to believe in love and companionship, no matter what others may think of your interracial dating. Remember, the most important ingredient to any relationship is love. No force on this Earth is greater than that of love, and once you find it gender, age, race, and religion are nothing more than small details that add to the beauty of the individual you love.

Does Online Dating Work?

Dating Online is currently the Internets biggest craze, and its here to stay! But does it actually work?

I mean, there are tons of Dating websites, but their success with matchmaking is kept rather low key, and I found out why.

When I was searching for Online dating websites, I felt that I couldn’t trust many of the companies and that they were just trying to get money out of me. After many hours of research I was exhausted by the idea of Online Dating, it just seemed more hassle than what it was worth, but I was determined to see it through.

A lot of websites that I researched were either free or had rock bottom membership fees, and I found that these were the worst to go to, bar a few exceptions. Eventually I found a handful of websites that I could trust and were worth the money that they were charging, but it just took so long to find these trust-worthy sites.

So I signed up and begrudgingly paid the membership fee. One of the most important aspects I learnt early on is that your personal profile that you place on the dating website should be immaculate! By this I mean spend time modifying and perfecting your profile, as this is what counts the most! The last thing you want is to be receiving messages from other adults who are just not right for you, its better to make contact with another adult who is very similar to yourself, than to make contact with 10 adults who only share a few similarities.

Eventually I started meeting other people who were very compatible to myself, and as a result have made 2 great friends who are now a major part in my life and have been going out with my long-term girlfriend for over a year (I’m planning a trip to New York at Christmas, so that I can propose to her!)

Online Dating has worked wonders for me, even though it’s taken time to get their, and I Strongly believe that if you spent time looking for the right Dating website, that’s suits you and your needs then you will also have similar success. This thought gave me a brainwave.

I thought how great it would be if their was a website that had a list of all the best Dating websites, that listed these trustworthy companies, so that the biggest hassle is taken away and you can start meeting and communicating with other adults, without having to waste time looking for the best companies. So that’s what I did. I designed a website that was split into sections for American Singles, Gay personals, Jewish Singles and Christian Dating, with the best dating websites for each category.

It is full of information about Online Dating, with reviews of every Dating website and loads of interesting, related articles. There is also help on the best way of writing your personal profile.

Online Dating Made Easy and Safe

As technology becomes more ingrained in our everyday lives, more people are turning to the Internet for social purposes. And over the past few years, this has become a more accepted form of communication. Friendships are formed and relationships made online.

But just how much trouble is it to join the online dating sites? And is it safe?

A few years ago, there was significant attention placed on those who turned to online dating. Consumers were warned that the sites were unsafe, used by predators who were looking for victims. But increased attention to security and awareness on the part of those using the services has made an incredible difference.

Many of the dating sites are now offering members ways to talk anonymously at first, then allowed to meet via web cam in private chat rooms. With the web cam options, it's more difficult to hide things like age.

Some sites also screen members personally. While the sites make no claims that they've gone so far as to perform background checks, they do often verify addresses and other information. Again, this isn't a full-fledged safety net, just one more precaution toward making online dating safer.

As more people are becoming completely comfortable with online communication and more people have access to Internet at home and at work, online dating sites have flourished. There are many sites that have very short sign-up processes and others that require you to answer lots of questions.

You'll typically be allowed to register for free, though you have to pay dues in order to gain access to other members' contact information. This is how the sites are able to boast that they have thousands of profiles available. Since it's free to sign up and post your information and photo, many people take that step with no intentions of going further.

If you're considering joining an online dating service, check out the membership requirements first. If security is important, take time to read what steps the dating service has taken to ensure the safety of its members.

Above all, take time to protect yourself. Remember that not everyone is honest. Just as you could meet a person on a park bench that offers lies about his or her life, you'll meet some people at online dating sites that are also untruthful. But you may also meet the love you've been looking for.

Homosexual Dating - Truth and Connection

Homosexual dating has become much more widespread and accepted in Western culture, allowing both gays and lesbians the chance to reach out to one another beyond that of closed doors. Now there are many ways you can have a rewarding homosexual dating experience, so don’t be afraid to get out there and explore all of the potential relationships you can create at a wonderful same-sex communities.

Homosexuality is a form of love that needs not to be judged or explained, because it is just another example of how when you love someone it doesn’t matter what colour their skin is, how old they are, or even what sex they are. True love knows no boundaries, has no discriminations and only wishes to be shared with another who returns the same emotions.

Unfortunately, not everyone agrees with this idea of love, and due to this fact, many homosexuals, regardless if they are male or female, are made to feel alienated, which can often lead to feelings of depression or loneliness. There is no reason why you should let these feelings overcome you, or let other opinions of those you care about, such as family members or friends, negatively influence your life when it comes to finding love, relationships, and homosexual dating.

Homosexual dating is about finding someone who feels the same way you do, enjoys spending time with you, treats you with respect and makes you feel like an equal. It is about being apart of a relationship with mutual understanding, which has the potential to forge a strong connection between both you and your partner.

Like any dating experience, there will be certain setbacks and struggles that you may face during homosexual dating. This is only natural, simply because in order for you to connect with someone, it is important that you feel comfortable with them.

As a gay or lesbian, you should not feel that you need to grab any opportunity that comes your way. There is no harm in starting as friends and working slowly into the relationship to discover how much you have in common. As long as you are honest with your feelings, you should have no problem finding a partner.

Homosexual dating is how you can establish an amazing connection with someone who understands you, and loves you for who you are with no questions asked. Even though you will meet some people who are destined to give you a hard time with your sexual preference, all you can do is trust your own judgments, be true to yourself, and give your love and time to those who deserve it.

online dating. Is it taken to seriously?

When I look at allot of the online dating services I notice one common trend. People take it very seriously into finding there true love. I find it absolutely amazing the amount of people who are looking for there absolute perfect match.

There seems to be so many profiles out there who tell people exactly what it is they want from a partner. Its as if there an owner of a company and there trying to fill a certain job position. They then take and list there requirements and what they expect from a person. If they don't meet those requirements then they think there unsuitable. I think that's crazy.

Dating is about getting to know people and then seeing if you enjoy spending time with them. You will often meet people who you thought you would never date and end up having a strong relationship with them. I'm not saying that it isn't good to have certain expectations. It is good to have an idea of what you want in a partner. I'm just saying you need to have an open mind.

So what should you put in your profile?

Intsead of a whole big list of stuff like this is what I want and this is what I expect, you should have a touch of personality. Sure you will have certain expectations. You need to personalize them, so they just don't sound like your looking for a perfect person. If you like to joke around then add some little funnies throughout your profile. You need to show off your personality. Show people how you see the world and that you don't take everything so seriously.

When you go to a nightclub you don't just go to meet someone, you go to have some fun too. You need to look at online dating in the same way. Have some fun with it and don't take it to seriously. You will make things much easier on yourself.

Latin Dating - Beauty and Romance

Like any other society, Latin culture is one that is embedded with traditions, values and celebrations. Of all the different attributes that are associated with Latino's, there is no question that passion and romance are considered to be two of the most intriguing.

If you are of Latin descent and are interested in seeking a relationship with another Latin man or woman, there are many ways you can go about creating the perfect romantic dating experience, that both you and your date should be able to enjoy with no strings attached.

The following are a few ideas of how you can create romance on your dates:


Dinner - Dinner is always a perfect dating choice, because you can make it as casual or romantic as you would like it to be. It all depends on where you go, and the way you act during the meal. If you are interested in being romantic at dinner, listen intently to what your date has to say, take his or her hand from across the table, look them in the eyes and be honest when you express yourself. However, you should keep in mind that romance can be interpreted as an invitation to sex, or even make the other person feel uncomfortable if they are interested in taking it slow. Therefore, be a tasteful romantic and know when to draw the line. For although you want to capture your date's interest, you don't want to make them feel uncomfortable in the process.


Dancing - Dancing is a great way for you to have fun, while still getting to know and remaining close to your date. Going to a club, or attending Latin dancing is how you can keep the romance freely escalating without having any further expectations hanging in the air.


Walking - You would be surprised to discover the power behind a nice leisurely walk. There is something truly magical about making nature apart of your date. Although not everyone is fortunate enough to have a beach close to them, there is sure to be parks, waterfronts and old fashioned neighbourhoods awaiting your footsteps. Holding hands and talking on an evening stroll, watching the sunset in silence, and gazing up at the stars, are just some of the ways you can use simple beauty to add to the romantic atmosphere of your date.


Due to the fact that traditions are an important part of Latin culture, dating someone of your same ethnic background is usually a plus when it comes to family relations, especially if you are interested in perusing a serious relationship with your dating partner.

Nevertheless, despite your dating intentions, there are many ways you can make your dating experience a beautiful time that you can truly enjoy who knows where a little romance can take you.

A guide to dating

People in long-term relationships, whether they are married or dating, often complain about getting into a rut. Your relationship may have started off with the great burst of passion and excitement but perhaps it began to wane because life is busy and work can where you out by the end of the day.

If you're in a dating relationship that seems to be in a rut, or wonder why you can't keep a long term relationship exciting anymore, perhaps you need to go back to the beginning. That doesn't mean you need to break up with your current partner and find someone new, it means you need to refresh the relationship with exciting and spontaneous activities.

When you look back on a period of your life, what is it that you remember? Is it the average day-in, day-out activities? Not likely. It is more likely those fun and spur-of-the-moment times when you did things that were hilarious or scary or new. That's what it means to go back to the beginning of a relationship, when everything you do is spontaneous and new.

Next time you and your girlfriend or boyfriend are deciding to do something on Friday, don't settle for dinner-and-a-movie. Do something different! Here are some ideas:

Play paintball
Rent a classic car
Go skydiving
Have a picnic

Or surprise your date with something spontaneous:

Start a water fight
Go for a romantic boat ride and tip the boat
Blindfold your date and take them somewhere they never been
Surprise your date at work just as they're finishing up for the day

Relationships fail for many reasons. One of the saddest reasons is that people simply drift apart because the other person doesn't excite them anymore. It doesn't have to be that you're your relationship, whether dating or married, can thrive when it is filled with adventures that the two of you share as you build memories together.

You'll look back on your time together with fondness as you consider the many fun and spontaneous things you did together. But doing those things is a choice. Choose to return to the beginning of your relationship and have fun again!

Mike's Dating Story

Mike was completely stressed when he walked into my office last week. Taking a long drink of water, he slumped onto my black leather couch and sighed.

“Coach,” he said. “I need to get out of my relationship.”

Mike is 38 years old and a successful screenwriter. Mike was also perpetually single with a long history of failed relationships. His situation is typical: he wasn’t necessary afraid of something long-term, he just could never find “the One”. Mike could never stay in a romantic situation for long before moving to something new.

Today’s session was no different. Once again he found himself feeling stuck with someone he didn’t want to be with. He told me his story.

“I met Lexy about a year ago. I was at a bar and there she was. She looked awesome and had a great smile. I was attracted and I just had to get to know her.”

For Mike it always started with physical attraction. He continued, “We really hit it off. The next thing you know, we are heavily involved. Things were great at least…the first six months were a blast…really fun. I think I gained ten pounds though. My buddy calls it the Love Diet. You stop going to the gym, order in, and stay in bed day and night.”

Mike’s enthusiasm began to fade as he said, “After the first six months things slowly started to change. We started to get to know each other outside of the bedroom. The more we talked, the more I realized that I had nothing in common with her. And to be honest…this is sort of rough to admit…I wasn’t interested in a thing she had to say.”

“Our relationship became tense at worst and polite at best. Little things started to bug me. The way she chewed her food drove me insane. The way she laughed…it was this high-pitched squeal that I think only dogs could hear…it made me nuts.”

He sighed. “I’m getting on her nerves too. Last week Lexy nearly shoved me out of bed because she said I was snoring too loud.”

Mike straightened up and locked eyes with me. “We need to break up and it’s been a long time coming anyhow. I’m okay with that. But what I really need to figure out is: what the heck is going on in my relationships? It’s always the same. Is it me? Am I meeting the right women? I’m 38 and I still haven’t figured it out.”

Dating often starts as a chance meeting where physical attraction leads us to relationships we “end up in” rather than a choice we stop and think about. We get caught up in the excitement of meeting someone new. We give in to the rush!
But eventually the “chemical reaction” of attraction begins to sputter. The excitement fades and we often find ourselves with a person we don’t know that well. In Mike’s case, he realized he was with someone he couldn’t stand to be around.

This leads us to online dating. There are aspects of character and personality that will create a bond beyond the initial stage of attraction, and online dating allows us to go beyond the chance meeting, beyond the physical attraction. We can search out potential matches that we might never meet in our everyday lives. With the click of a mouse we have access to a wealth of information: interests, hobbies, passions, lifestyle, beliefs, and more.

Online dating allows us to approach dating from an entirely different angle. Instead of getting to know someone from the outside-in, we can establish a relationship from the inside-out.

Does this “more informed” method your romantic life lead to a more compatible and satisfying relationship? Unfortunately the answer is “No!”

Just like physical attraction alone isn’t enough to carry a long-term relationship, having things in common alone won’t satisfy you. You still need physical attraction. You may find tons of people online who will seem perfect. Then you meet face-to-face and you know in a split-second that this person is not for you. You never really know what will happen until you meet.

But imagine if you are attracted! The reason you decided to meet in the first place was because you have things in common and your personalities meshed. You’ve already laid the foundation to take your dating beyond the physical.
.
What online dating really offers is opportunity to find and communicate with lots of people with whom we share common interests and qualities. It’s not the holy grail of dating, but it’s an excellent way to increase your chances of finding something long-term.
You may still have to go on many dates to find your match, but that is why the Internet is so exciting! There are always new people to find, and always the opportunity for that next date.

Mike is currently online dating and loving it! I encourage you to give it a try for yourself.

Online Dating Tips

Finding your soul mate online is a wondrous thing; however, there is the potential for danger. While you have access to a wide variety of people, you also have the impending complication of meeting those who are not what they seem to be--there are some tips of the trade, though, to help you become more discerning with your choices. These tips can help you stay safe and stay away from men and women who are not what you’re looking for.

Tip One: Start Slowly. There are all kinds of people on the Love Empire; not all of these people, however, will be right for you. Take your time--if you meet someone and start up a conversation, proceed with discretion. The person at the other end may not be who they claim to be; take your time and watch for inconsistencies or odd behavior. If something bothers you, simply walk away. Do not rush into any relationship without thinking first.

Tip Two: Protect Your Identity. One of the benefits of dating online is that you can get to know someone based solely upon their personality and not deal with the more social conscious real world. It is up to you to decide when and how you reveal who you really are--be careful, however. If someone receives your personal information, they could use it against you. If a member tries to pressure you into giving out your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information, then walk away.

Tip Three: Use Common Sense. When speaking to someone through the Love Empire, do not throw good judgment away simply because this is an online service. What may sound wonderful on the screen can be masking something not so wonderful in reality. Use caution and do not fall in love with the first profile you read. Take your time and go through all of your potential choices. Then, after you’ve researched enough, go from there. It is a common occurrence for people to “fall in love” after only one conversation. Do not do this! Retain your common sense and view online dating as you view real-world dating. You do not have to love every profile you read.

Tip Four: Request A Photo. If you meet someone, chat with them, and see the beginning of a relationship forming, then you might want to request a photo. Often, this can tell you more about the person than any email or instant message. First of all, it can keep them from lying about their looks; secondly, you will know if you’re attracted to them in the physical sense; finally, if they continually refuse to send a photo, there might be a reason other than embarrassment. Proceed carefully.

Tip Five: Pay Attention. This is, possibly, the most important tip you could follow. In an email, any one can sound wonderful--in real life, it’s much more difficult. When you are becoming involved with someone on the Love Empire, watch for ‘red flags’, or odd behavior. For example, if during an online session, your date suddenly becomes angry or aggressive toward you and then, won’t explain why, you should take this into consideration. If one sentence could upset him/her in such a way, it might be cause to worry. Also, pay attention to any attempts to pressure or control you. For instance, if your date is constantly making demeaning comments about you, there is a strong chance that he/she is trying to manipulate you into feeling inferior; therefore, you become an easier target to control. Finally, watch out for inconsistencies with information that your date provides you or evasive answers to questions. If your date displays any of the following problems, it would be well-advised to reconsider your relationship:

1. He/she provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc.
2. He/she refuses to speak to you on the phone after you have established an
3. online relationship; or, he/she will only speak on a strangely specific
4. timeframe.
5. He/she will not answer any direct questions about themselves. They will
6. either give you a vague answer or will simply turn the question back to you.
7. He/she will only provide photos of large groups of people, making it
8. impossible for you to find them.

Online dating can be an exciting and fulfilling part of your life; just remember
to follow these tips and act accordingly.

e-Matchmaking: Can a Computer Program Find Love For You?

I logged on to a dating site the other day and was greeted by a large, flashing message. It promised that if I took the time to answer a series of questions that they would find a "perfect match" for me. Imagine that? All the work and worry of being single - gone! We truly have evolved! Not only can computer programs manage the entire traffic system of a city and make chess grandmasters cry, but now they can lead my perfect match right to my doorstep. I always wanted a Stepford wife, I hope it comes assembled.

The recent trend in Internet Dating has been the use of a "computer personality test" of some sort. Websites claim that these tests, usually developed by a "top psychologist", have the ability to understand you and your needs through a series of questions. Confused? Lost in love? Problems communicating? Don't worry, the Online Dating Hal 5000 can figure you out! In fact, when you're done, this computer program will know your needs and desires better than you do.

Remember the Broadway play “Fiddler on The Roof”? You might not, it was the first Broadway play I went to when I was seven. A song that always stuck in my head for some reason was “matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match…” The song starts as a plea to the matchmaker to bring true love straight to the altar; someone beautiful, rich, intelligent, and perfect.

But by the end of the song, the singer realizes that the Matchmaker might not be up to the task. She decides that “playing with matches, a girl can get burned”.

So, do these tests really work?

Personality tests have a long history. Really, really smart guys with names like Freud, Maslov, Fromm, and Jung developed respected psychological theories, and these theories are used as the basis for all types of tests. “The Big Five” theory suggests that there are five dimensions of personality: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. Some popular personality tests use this as a foundation. Others go the “Big Three” route, which does away with the “openness” and “agreeableness” dimensions - mostly because it’s easier to remember.

I joke a little about these theories, but the truth is that they’ve survived the test of time and there is a ton of scientific research behind them. The real question is if these tests can be effective in applying a theory to the complexity of a human being. Add to this the additional layer of meshing your answers with another, equally complex person. That’s a tall order.

People have impulsive behavior that simply can’t be measured when they’re sitting, relaxed and introspective, taking one of these tests. Often our answers reflect our perfect (or hopeful) idea of ourselves. Even if we are trying our best to be honest, our impulsive behavior in real-life situations can be far different than we’d expect.

Another wildcard is attraction. We can meet someone who’s empirically good-looking, has a similar background, is kind and successful – and yet we’re not attracted. Often we can’t explain why we like another person. It may be how they make us laugh, a crooked smile – even how they smell! Sometimes little things that are immeasurable on their own can collectively make us attracted.

Human beings and our emotions and desires are far too complex, and a computer program can’t solve the riddles of our romantic lives. As Jung put it, “the meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances; if there is a reaction both are transformed”. It sounds good, but even Jung was hedging his bet when it comes to love. What will cause two individuals to react to each other? Even the developers of the study of personality would not presume that a series of questions could predict romance.

If you rely solely on matchmaking services, you are missing the entire beauty of online dating. The beauty is opportunity. Online dating offers you an almost limitless opportunity to meet and date new people. It gives you the time and space to find what best suits you. Going to a quality dating site that isn’t trying to sell you fantasy of finding your match for you will mean you will have a pool of millions of singles to meet.

Treat matchmaking options as just another fun way to explore. It can serve as an ice breaker to start a conversation, but don’t expect them to be the answer to finding your perfect match. Keep all options open and explore possibilities. As a unique individual, only can you know what works for you. You need to develop skills to communicate and meet people. Developing both online and offline dating skills is the best way to find the right relationship.

Next time you’re brushing your teeth, take a look in the mirror. See that amazing person? That’s your matchmaker with a mouthful of toothpaste. Take charge of your life and get into action! Enjoy dating and enjoy the process of discovery. Your experiences, both good and not-so-good, are essential to finding the right person for you.

Warning Signs: Your Guy May be a Mr. Wrong instead of Mr. Right

1. He always make plans at the last minute.

He may have several rods on the fire. You might not be his favorite rod. If nothing else comes along then you pop into his head. Some men just like to keep their options open. They have several choices available and don't want to make the wrong decision or commit to a date too soon in the event that something better might come along. You have to decide if this is something you can tolerate. If you are not that into him either, it may work out perfectly for you (a girls gotta eat), but if you are waiting by the phone this may be sign to move on. I personally would not feel I was being treated respectfully in this situation.I would feel I deserved to be treated better.

2. He's not taking an active role in becoming part of your world.

If a man is serious about you, he will usually make the effort to get to know the people who are important to you. Whether it's your friends or family, he will want it to be known that he is your man and he will usually try hard to make a good impression. This is how some men mark their territory. Hey, it doesn't hurt if everyone loves him and sings his praises to you. If he doesn't care about that, he simply might not care about you. If he does care about you, but doesn't want to be involved in your world... well, that's a whole other story. You come to your own conclusion, but if it were me... I'd rethink the relationship.

3. He doesn't go to events that are important to you.

Once in awhile if he has a good excuse or is ill or something...that's ok. If you see a pattern, it may be time to trade up. Something that is important to you should be equally important to him. If it is not, then it might be a sign that either he is not that into you, he prefers his friends to you, or he is simply too self-centered to stop for a minute and please someone other then himself. If you've really hit the jackpot, he may be a combination of all three. Either way, pay attention to the signs and decide if you feel you are worthy of more.

4. He stays in close contact with his single friends.

If a guy does not part with his single friends, you can be fairly certain he is not going to give up the single life either. Some guys are just players: they have to keep their options open and have a certain amount of emotional distance. Having single friends when you are dating is the best of both worlds. He may continue to get close to you, but his friends are never far behind. They attend events with you and have permission to just drop by at their whim. You don't want your guy to give up his friends, but it may be a sign of trouble if he insists that you spend most of your time together hanging out with his buddies.

If he is not a player, but just very social, make sure your needs are met as well. Hanging out with the buds can be fun, but sometimes alone time is also needed in a relationship. If the situation meets your needs, then great. If not, then decide if this is something you can get used to.

5. Night time is the right time... all the time.

If he loves the nightlife and the nightlife loves him even after you have been dating for a while, this might just be his way of life. If this is your way of life, then you have just met your soulmate. I wish you well. However, historically when couples first start dating they tend to go out a lot, stay out late, and dance the night away. Once you settle in, though, and get closer in the relationship, the pendulum swings to quite nights at home and romantic dinners. If this is where you are hoping the pendulum would swing, then it may be a good time to express your needs and see if he can meet them. Don't ask or expect him to change if that is who he is and what makes him happy. Accept the fact that you want different things. It may be time to send this one back and explore the other "fishies in the sea".

6. You never see him more then once a week (ok... sometimes twice), even after you have been dating several months

Is he super busy or are you play toy number 7? He might have one for every day of the week, and you only can see him twice if numbers 1 through 6 are busy. Hey, it happens ... mostly because he has been allowed to get away with it. Just don't be naive and think he is sitting home 6 nights alone. If this is acceptable to you, then by all means enjoy your time together when it happens. I guess you will certainly never get sick of each other. If you need more see if he can (or more importantly will) meet your needs. If not...get those shoes on and start walking.

7. You only have his cell number after you have been dating each other for a more then a month.

If it's been months and you haven't asked him about that...allow me...he's either living with someone else or he doesn't want you calling his house in case he has another woman over. The cell phone he can turn off or set to vibrate... How perfect is that? When you are into someone (and not dating other women too) you want her to feel free totally comfortable calling you anytime. It shows commitment and openness. If he is not showing these signs outwardly, it might be an indication that you are dating a very busy man. If it feels like a duck and quacks like a duck... yup, it's a duck. This little trick was used on me, and I must say I didn't catch on for quite a while. I was too naive...I'm all grown up now.

Instant Dating Strategies Anyone Can Use

Most of us walk around caught up in our own thoughts. We don't look at people as we walk down the street and we have the radio blasting in the car so we don't even notice those single, sexy individuals in the cars next to us.

Tip #1 Get out of your head and into your environment.

Instead of saying that there aren't any available guys out there, why not take your head out of your book at Barnes and Noble and notice if anyone is noticing you?

There are probably plenty of attractive men out there dying to ask you out. Your body language may be part of the reason why they don't.

Tip #2 Have open body language. This means no crossed arms. No hiding behind books. No hunching your shoulders.

Tip #3 Make eye contact. Instead of looking down when a cute guy looks at you, meet his gaze. The right eye contact can be sexier than the hottest verbal conversations.

Tip #4 Smile more. Studies have proven that a smiling face is thought to be friendlier and more attractive than someone who goes around with a tight jaw. Relax your jaw and allow your lips to be at least partly parted at all times. Notice the difference in how many more people smile, look your way and approach you.

Online Dating for Dummies

Whether you have been dating for years, getting back in the game, or just starting out, you could always use a bit of dating advice. Not the kind you get from your mother, but rather the kind that actually might get you past the first date, on to the 2nd and perhaps on to a happily ever after.
So you have decided to date and you are thinking about the "online dating" thing? Well, why not. To be cliche' everyone is doing it! In today's action packed, hustle, bustle world, who had time or energy to meet the traditional ways. Online meeting has become a norm, and is gaining in acceptability.

Writing Your Profile Many online dating services offer assistance in writing your profile, if you are not a good writer then this may be something you should consider. Before you sit down to write your profile, find out how others see you, so that you can more adequately describe yourself as you are seen. (You don't see yourself as others do - probably) The best way to do this is ask around. You don't have to tell anyone why - just ask for one word that describes your looks, work habits, home environment etc get a list and go from there. Chances are you will come closer to a good description of yourself that way than any other way.

To Post a Picture or Not To Post - That is the question Well are you photogenic? You know even if you aren't there has to be a picture somewhere of you that looks good. Find it! Whoever said a picture is worth a thousand words knew what the were talking about. And let's face it - this is a shallow society - we are attracted by looks in addition to pleny of other things - but looks are definetly high on the list. Not putting up a picture leads to suspicion of whether you are attractive or not - what's wrong with you! Put it up there.

Free Online Dating Services, Trials, and Charges You get what you pay for - most of the time. Most of the online dating services charge. It's a huge market - just doesn't seem like it when you are actually trying to find a date does it? The best thing to do is find a trial service, or a service that allows you to wink or send eye contact or a smile to another party to let them know you are interested. So if you both just send that and then it goes nowhere you have to decide - are they worth the fee to join the site to find out more. If you do decide to join, keep in mind that most of these sites won't let the other person respond without also having a membership. That does not mean however that you can't send them an alternate method of contacting you. There is nothing more frustrating than being contacted by someone you would like to write back to, but no way to do that unless you also join. Is it worth the fees? Some site editors are not too bright either and you can sneak little ways into your profile that allow future interested parties a way to find you. Such as saying something like - "I have the same name where the little yellow man is" would tell someone that your username at AOL would be the same as your username on the profile and they might then contact you without you either one buying a membership.

If you choose to post on more than one site, try to spice each profile up a bit differently. No one wants to read the same thing twice, and what you might have missed out on saying in one profile may be the thing that catches someone's attention on another profile. Use different pictures too.

What to be Cautious of Online meeting has allowed us to move a bit faster than traditional dating. Your inhibitions all fall down when you are sitting behind a computer screen and you can do or say or flirt however you want and it's not as difficult as it is face to face. What that usually leads to is assuming you know someone better than you normally would before you've ever had that first date - but beware - their inhibitions were down too and they may have come across a lot greater than they really are.

Do You Take Down Your Profile When You Meet Someone? Well - did they take down their profile? If they did, and you are serious about being exclusive, then you should take down your profile. (on all the sites you have it up on) But if they haven't and you aren't then leave it up. Think how many fish swimming around in the sea might nibble on your bait while you have it out there!

Perhaps getting online and flirting and maybe even meeting up with someone is the push you need to get out more and enjoy life. Maybe it leads to happily ever after. Whatever it leads to enjoy it and yourself!


TenTips On How To Get That Guy

1. Show the Guy That You Are Vulnerable

Men need to feel needed, yes it may be from the dinosaurs but it does still apply. I do not mean that you have to be weak, give in to whatever he wants, and put up with any way he treats you I am not suggesting that. Many men like strong women, but strong women who put out that they do not need a guy often end up alone. It is fine to be strong but try and temper it with "ok here is a situation where I can be vulnerable". Men have a strong protective instinct, though
they may rarely show it.

2. Let The Guy Think That He Is Doing The Hunting

Men love the thrill of the chase, it is in their genetic makeup, it is definately a male thing. Play a little secretive and hard to get, and men will flock like bees to honey.
That means having a sense of your own worth, men hate women who are clingy. They are not props, they hate boosting a womens ego all the time. In fact men
want a real balanced person. Make him feel he wants to make the first move and do the chasing. Women learn to manipulate men at a very early age. By the age of five most girls have learnt how to wrap their father around there little finger.

3. "Let The Guy Think That He Is Mr Right Rather Than Mr Right Now!"
Stroke their egos, they are not a ticket to go out and pay all the time, let them know that you really value them as a person.

4. Laugh At His Jokes
This is imperative that a man feels he is funny and witty and is an extension of three, they are valued for their sense of humour. Where would we be in life without
laughter.

5. Never Call Him After The First During The Next Week
If a guy is interested in seeing you again, trust me he will call you in the first week. He will do this even if he says he has to go out of town. If you call him, you come
across as over-anxious. You appear desperate, and are more likely to scare the guy off. It is OK to ask him out the first time but not the second.

6. If You Are Dating Online Get A Professional Photo Taken At A Studio
When dating online you have to market yourself to be successful. A professional photographer will know how to get the best shots out of you and make you look your very best.

7.Don't Go Out With Your Girlfriends In Large Groups
Some men feel that approaching a women in a large group is intimidating. Go out in smaller groups, and make it easier for an interested guy to approach you.

8. Approach Him
Be confidant enough to approach him and ask him if he wants to go for a coffee. If you're not sure whether he is gay or not, then approach him anyway.
If he gives you the brush-over then you have lost nothing, but you can pat yourself on the back for taking the initiative, most men will be flattered by this.

9. You Like Him But He Is Ignoring You
Guys are insecure, and they want to feel liked, and popular. Start ignoring him for a while, not rudely, you don't have to make an issue out of it. Just look right through him, and he will start to be piqued. There is no guarantee here he may not take it any further, it may just boost his confidance, but you have not lost anything

10. Don't Appear To Be Desperate
Desperation is a real turn off for men. It is an indicator that a woman is going to start to get clingy, and that is not good. Appear yourself and show a friendly interest.

The Final Solution for Dating

I run a blog where I discuss the topic of the many games people play in the dating arena. I've posted hundreds of articles, many of which point out many of these troubles. Even if you haven't read the blog, you probably are aware of some of these schemes. While I wish it were easy to sum everything up into one neat, overlying problem, it's not that simple. Let me point out just a few of the issues.

For one, there's a definite lack of respect in dating nowadays. People don't even care about their partners enough to treat them as they deserve to be treated. Gossip, ridiculously high expectations, and rejections by ignorance are only some of the examples in this area. Grandparents are always carrying on about how today's generation has such a lack of respect. They talk about how, in their day, people cared about others and banded together through difficult problems. Why do they talk about these things? Because they're right! Through every activity in which I've been involved, I've encountered this problem. I'm tired of working for a hundred hours on a video project when the president of the organization receives but doesn't bother to even reply to your E-Mails asking him to review it. I'm sick of being ostracized from groups because I don't care to participate in their petty disagreements. And I'm exhausted after people expect me to work to death in volunteer organizations!

There are always exceptions to this rule, and I'm sure that there are many people who do have a great deal of respect for both their peers and their elders. Unfortunately, the majority, or at least the majority with the most influence, simply don't care.

Second, nobody is honest with themselves, let alone anyone else. Dating has turned into a torrent of backstabbing of which even Mark Burnett would be proud. Asking someone out is nearly impossible, because the gossip about it has already spread to a thousand people before you make the move. Then, when a rejection occurs (even if it's not rude), the rejector spreads rumors around to all his/her friends that cause them to completely ignore you, refusing to invite you to parties or even to initiate conversations with you. The biggest insult is that even if you asked point-blank, you'd still never get a truthful answer as to why such harm was directed towards you.

As if what occurs after a rejection isn't enough, people attempt to steal others' girl/boyfriends. One day, things are going well, and the next you find yourself wondering what happened to the relationship that was forming - that is, until you notice that person spending a lot of time with who you thought was your best friend. No explanation is offered, not even a "good-bye."

Third, people are not looking for someone who spends his or her time working to get ahead instead of getting flat-out drunk, who doesn't curse at or ignore his or her mate, and who actually makes time for whatever is occurring between them (whether it be a full-fledged relationship or just plain sex). They say they're looking for these things, but in reality, they're attracted to people with the attributes described above. "Confidence" is not the answer to the equation. Assuming they both possess the same level of "confidence," the above-described person would win every time over the "warm, caring, and intelligent" (wo)man that people claim is the ideal mate.

The list of problems goes on. You might be intrigued to hear that while the problems seem innumerable, I propose they can all be rectified with the simplest of solutions. There's no danger involved, nobody has to lead radical changes, and it doesn't involve an "impossible" fight against biology.

I simply propose for men to stop asking women out.

Not for the rest of your life, but for just a short time, say, a month. It's not impossible, and you won't have to do it as much after the month passes. While there are a few (rare) exceptions, the vast majority of women don't ask out men 50% of the time. Women do have the advantage in dating, and it's time to level the playing field. Sure, talk with women as friends, and if someone initiates a conversation with you, then definitely reciprocate. However, let the woman ask you out if she's interested, no matter how attractive she is to you.

Some women have never asked anyone out in their lives. It's no wonder why these women continually treat men like they're lower beings. If they had to put up with the rejections that most men do all the time, I guarantee that they would have more respect for men. Women would no longer put up with moving from guy to guy based on who was interested in her at the moment. And spreading gossip about potential romantic interests certainly isn't going to help one's prospects.

People need to realize that humans, for all their ancestry, are not monkeys or horses or rabbits. They're humans, who can think and act for themselves.

Men have so much more capacity in the dating arena than constantly looking for sex at all costs, if they would only exercise it. It's time to stop being prisoners to so-called "biology." Women have the same urges men do, and they should do half the work, not 10% or 20%.

There are a lot of "seduction communities" on the Internet that teach men how to "seduce" women. I don't know of any similar organization that teaches women how to impress men with the same fervor.

There's my proposal. I don't think it's hard to implement. Imagine if all the men even at one corporation or university decided to ban together. Laziness won't be a problem, becausenobody even has to do anything. It's time to change our distorted culture. All I'm suggesting is to promote equality. Is that such a bad thing?

Warning Signs: Your Guy May be a Mr. Wrong instead of Mr. Right

The key to being irresistable to men is more about you and less
about them.

It is about accentuating every one of your strengths both
internally and externally and reveling in them.
So before we show you how to flirt, tease and seduce, we are going to teach you how to pamper, indulge and revel in the delicious power of being a woman.

1) Before going out to socialize or even see the one that you are currently dating, take a few minutes to visualize what you want to happen. Picture in detail exactly who you want and what you want to happen between you. What qualities will your perfect lover have?

How will he look at you? How will he touch you? Add in as much
detail as possible. Knowing what you want is the first step to
having it.

2) Before seeing the man you are dating or stepping foot outside the door, take care with your appearance. Look in the mirror and identify all the things that you like about yourself. If you focus on the qualities that you like about yourself, you will have far more confidence in yourself than most women out there. That will show and give you an edge.

3) Accentuate those positive qualities.

For example: If you have full shiny hair make the most of it. Let
it flow down your shoulders. Play with it in front of the one you
desire. Men have a fascination with hair.

If you have full pouty lips, apply liner around the edges then fill
in with a deep gloss that accentuates your skin tone, then apply a lighter coat just in the center of your lips. This will give them
even more sex appeal.

4) Play up your eyes. A lot of flirting is done with eye play. Look
at him then look away. Use your eyes to tell him everything that
you are feeling, everything that you would like to do to him.

5)Wear clothes that accentuate your assets. Hint at your curves
without exposing them. Remember less is more. Incite his curiosity. Make him want to see more.

6) Wear a delicate scent. Apply your perfume twenty minutes before you go out the door. A woman's scent is enticing. Overpowering perfume, on the other hand, is a major turn off.

7) Take care of your whole body, not just your face. Most women wash their face daily and moisturize but what about the rest of you? Take care of your skin. Use a good sugar scrub on your body and follow with a rich moisturizer. If your body feels silky smooth, you will feel and act sexier. Plus the man of your dreams won't be able to resist caressing your smooth, silky soft skin.

Female Self Pleasuring Tips For The Adventurous Woman

Unlike men, whose sex organs are available for self pleasure by stroking and stimulating any time of the day, women have to contrive to entice their clitoris out of hiding and available for pleasuring. One of the most common female self pleasuring tips is the use of sex toys and gadgets.

Luckily for us, female self pleasure toys can be found in our very own kitchen. Sure, jokes have been made about this, but it’s true. The usual suspects here are any penis-like vegetables and fruits, like carrots, cucumbers or zucchinis. Bananas are too soft to do the trick. Sometimes, un-penis-like fruits and vegetables can create another type of female self pleasure as a form of taste aphrodisiac: cherries, grapes, or sections of oranges. Feel free to use different female self pleasure techniques to enhance your arousal. Inserting any of the penis-like items inside your vulva, as you would a dildo will add to your self pleasure. As a female self pleasure technique, the use of fruits and vegetables has a lot going for it: It will not endanger you physically, in contrast to, for example, using a bottle, which might break inside you, or, a piece of wood, which might splinter--ouch! I am not sure that anyone has ever used an open bottle for this purpose, but it is worth cautioning all women against it: An open bottle will form a-suction inside you and it would be quite impossible to remove it without the embarrassment of explaining to a doctor why you are depositing strange objects inside your vagina.

After you’ve pleasured yourself with just about everything you can from your fridge, you might want to try a dildo. Dildos have been manufactured to be sold and used especially for female self pleasuring. They were not merely created to aid men in their sexual fantasies when they watch all those erotic movies. Erotic movies, however, are very informative when it comes to learning how to use dildos. Use a dildo to massage your clitoris and slide it in and out and around your vagina. Even better are the men, who possess the lingual skillfulness similar to a dildo but more importantly, they are selfless enough to aspire to that ability. Either way, these great female self pleasuring techniques will open up a whole new world of female self pleasuring ideas.

"COMING SOON...Online Attractions - Featuring all of the beautiful men and women searching for LOVE"

In my attempts to find the love of my life, I knew that they were not going to be found in the town where I lived, so I took to the Internet. My first experience was the result of a television commercial. They looked so darn happy, you couldn’t help but wonder if this could also work for you, so I tried it. Put it this way, finding my “Mr. Right” may have ended up costing me a small fortune!

Then one day I was working on my computer and along came an annoying pop-up. Normally, I delete them as fast as they pop-up, but this one caught my eye. It was for another dating site. Once inside the site, I was amazed at all of the handsome black men and a few white ones too, who were looking for the perfect black woman.

Because of how I am, my desire for monogamy, this is who I was looking for, someone who had the same desire as me. What I quickly found out, on my first night on the site is that most men don’t even bother to read your profile they just look at your picture and click! Thanks for the compliment, I think? However, when a man takes the time to read your profile, he is going a little deeper than just the physical attraction and actually learns a little about you before sending you a message.

At that time my profile was a little friendlier, more inviting. What I found was that I spent more time eliminating those who did not fit the bill until I thought I had found the one. However I have a hard time giving all of my attention and affection to someone who is not returning the favor. And because of who I am, it is not in my nature to be intimate with more than one person at a time. To me, intimacy definitely includes more than just sex. It involves allowing a person to really get to know who you are, what your likes and dislikes are, what your loves and fears are, trusting to the point of vulnerability. So because I was not getting what I needed in return for what I was giving, I said audios!

I decided to give this site another go. This time I spelled out exactly what I expected in my profile. It was probably more intimidating to some. I think that they could tell that I was very serious about what I am saying and if they are all about the game, they don’t even bother to click. That’s good! As I say, that way I don’t have to bother cutting away the fat to get to the meat. Or as one gentleman said, “the apples at the top of the tree are more appealing but the ones on the ground are easier to get.” I am still the same person, but this time I am realizing that it’s really all about the game. The object of the game is to talk with whomever you want, as many as you want, as much as you want, as intimately as you want, all at the same time, and finally, if you choose to do so, you can select the one who has won you over from all of your many admirers. However, don’t forget that while you are being pursued by him, he is being pursued by others and he is also pursuing others at the same time he is pursuing you. It’s like one big orgy!

For this very reason, I don’t think that online dating is right for me. But let’s turn that around. Online dating is what you make it. You can play by your own rules. As for me, I really don’t care what the others do; I will stick to my molasses method of one person at a time. The problem is finding that one who would be willing to give up the buffet to see what the steak taste like. I’m sure that it will take me longer this way to find the one who is right for me, but after all when I do, it will have been well worth the time—for both of us!

How Did Online Dating Become So Popular?

The reason is pretty simple. It is very much the same reason that the internet itself became so popular. The Internet opens up a whole new world of communication and contact. And the reasons for this are given below.

Speed

Try to picture what used to happen earlier in the days when people had to depend on the good ol’ postal system. During those days, a person had to wait for one or two days for a letter to get across to a person who lived in the same state itself. The second person in turn would take one or two days to respond and this letter would take on or two days to get back to the first person.

So in effect, a single correspondence would stretch over a week. But now it’s a totally different story. The time taken for the first letter and the response has been brought to an amazing 2 minutes! Waiting may make the heart grow fonder but e-mail makes two people get close faster!

Privacy

The Internet provides for absolute privacy too. One can carry out communication with another person in the absolute privacy of one’s bedroom or bath room or wherever one chooses to be. There is no fear of eavesdropping (ugh) or over hearing (shudder!) thanks to e-mail and chat facilities.

Options and Opportunities

The Internet provides for other options like voice chat or video conferencing and stops short only of the physical touch. But then who would want to start a relationship by touching right away? You can see a person, talk to a person, and listen to the person’s voice, can you think of a better way to start a date?

Economy

All this and more is possible thanks to the internet and the best part is that all this comes to you for peanuts. All you need is a P.C (who doesn’t have one?) and an Internet Connection (how can anybody live without one) and you are all set. The only thing more you could ask for is a step by step guide to find your dream date…well here it is!

Fun Dating Ideas to Spice Up Your Marriage

One of the best benefits of marriage is that you have a permanent dating partner. Don't let the fun end after the honeymoon. Here are some ideas for fun dates.


1. Spend an afternoon at the opera. These aren't as expensive as you might think. Check out a local college for possible discounts on campus performances. If you go, be sure to check out the plot of the story beforehand.


2. Sample a variety of cafe's. Instead of just staying at one restaurant, have dinner at one place and dessert at another. Try to find places within walking distance, this way you can enjoy the scenery.


3. Head to the zoo. The zoo can be quite a fascinating place. Check out everything from pengiuns to gorillas. If you're more of an aquatic fan, check out your nearest aquarium.


4. Up for peanuts! A summer ball game is always fun, whether it's major league or little league.


5. Hit the outdoors. Pack a lunch and head to the nearest trails or even learn to kayak.


6. Check out the museums. Whatever your interests, you're sure to find a museum that matches your tastes. The next time you're out on a dinner date. Stop in at a museum before-hand.


7. Picnics are always a pleasure. Pack a lunch and a blanket and head to your nearest park.


Are you more of an adventurous type? Check out some of these ideas.


* Design a card board box car and order your favorite meals at a fast food restaurant.


* Get together with friends and make your own movie. You could also film a scavenger hunt. These are a blast to film and to watch.


Are you a married couple looking for some cheap dating ideas? You could:


- Sketch your dream-house floor plan and talk about the possibilities of each room.
- Attend an art festival.

- Walk in the rain.

- Build a fire, turn out the lights and talk for hours.

- Go swimming in the middle of the night.
- Build a snowman together.

- Take a bike ride.

- Have a candlelight picnic in the backyard.

- Share a milkshake with two straws.

- Go to a coffee shop.

- Raid the kids room and fly a kite.

Hope these ideas help to put a little quirky fun into your marriage.

Tuesday 17 May 2011

How to Increase Being Asked Out by 80%


How to Program Your Man

Wouldn't it be wonderful if you could program your man as easily as
purchasing your next flick on pay per view?

Well it isn't as absurd as it sounds. Every day we program each
other subconsciously.
There are reasons why we like certain people and dislike others.
Many time this has nothing to do with logic and everything to do
with anchors.

Anchors create automatic responses. For example, many people smell
chocolate chip cookies or warm apple pie and think of warm happy
afternoons spent in their mother's kitchen. Just the scent creates
good feelings.
Another example on the flip side may be the sound of sirens. Many
of us get nervous at just hearing them in the vicinity when we are
driving, and begin nervously looking for police officers ready to
bust us for speeding.

We all have anchors. The good news is that while most people live
their life on autopilot, you can learn how to create anchors in
yourself and in the men that you want to date.

Here is one quick example: The next time that you are out on
a date or approached by a man that you find attractive:

1) smile at him and crack a joke

2) As soon as he starts smiling and laughing reach over and squeeze
his arm lightly.

That simple touch combined by the good feelings your joke inspired
has just become his anchor.

3) Now whenever you see him and want to inspire that same feeling
lightly squeeze his arm in the same place. He will automatically
feel good about you again.

Try it for yourself!

The Cyber Lothario

Are you writing to someone who is romancing you off your feet? Does this guy seem to know just what to say or write that gets you a step or two further down the garden path?

Perhaps more dangerous than the notorious Internet rapists and murderers are the Cyber Lotharios. Maybe you know one. Smooth as silk. Seduction is his native language.

More dangerous, because these guys (well, maybe there are girls too, but I am more familiar with the guys) are GOOD.

These guys are the Internet equivalent of a Bill Clinton, if Bill Clinton hadn't gotten caught. They are the cyber version of handsome -- they write beautifully, know just what you want to hear and tell you. They POUR it on, and for a thirsty woman, it is nectar from the Gods.

These fellows post on dating sites indefinitely, waiting for the unsuspecting newbie to the dating site. You might contact him, he might contact you, but like a used car salesman, he knows a pigeon when he sees one.

Then slowly, softly, but determinably, he has his way with you.

How do you tell if you have one of these guys on the wire? What if he is a really nice guy, really meaning every word he says?

Well, one thing would be if you find yourself agreeing to things that you never would if you were in your right mind. Particularly if that has to do with sex. Or maybe money.

These guys make manipulation feel like a warm bath. You just slide right in and it feels delicious.

But there is a certain vagueness, particularly about past relationships, and perhaps about future plans. These guys may reassure, but they also will leave themselves a way out.

How can you tell?

Well, one thing you can do is ask for a relationship history. Then pay attention to how he responds, as well as what he actually says.

Does he groan and moan about doing the job? Is he grudging in what he tells you? Or is he open and serious, understanding what you are asking and why?

Does he seem to have trouble remembering his own history, what her name was, what order the different relationships came in? Is he reluctant to divulge, or does he sound like he is fudging?

Does he seem to be moving you fast towards a romantic getaway? Maybe he makes plans for the two of you to meet, and reserves only one room. Is he heavily sexually suggestive and titillating? Does he ask questions like "What kind of lingerie are you wearing?"

Even though a new and legitimate relationship can be highly sexually charged, a guy who is seriously interested in you and a possible future with you will be protective and understanding of you and your feelings.

If you feel antsy, pay attention. If your hormones may be doing your thinking, put on the brakes. Better to let this dangerous Clark Gable type swim away than to be left flat and busted.

The male orgasm

In the past years sex has changed from the simple sex between couples either married, engagae or dating. It was just the simple forplay of touching and kissing of the lips and neck. Over the years it evelpved into more foreplay where men and women can find that sensual feeling from just the tongue and the fingers.It even changed in the way of not being something of true feelings and emotions and love. Now it is mainly about pleassure and ability to perform at your best. Now it is a simbol that is shown as an important aspect of every human being who know about the aspects of sex and also who have the ability of prforming this act.

In this century of sexually explicit ideas and products the simple orgasm was mainly intended for the female body. Where most products onthe market give rise to satisfying a woman's body. The human body has many different nerve points and the all are aroused in sexual acts. The feeling a woman gets when she has an orgasm.

Now in my own sexual encounters i am what u would call a blosoming rose of this sexuall influenced world. As a woman i speak for all womaen when i say having and orgasm is a feeling of utter satisfaction. The only way i can explain it to you is the feeling of every nerve in your body pulling at the same time which cause u to make that sunsual noise that turns a man on.

I have found the new wave of the woman's sexual ability it does not involve any sex but im tell u now this will revolutionise the hold woman will have over men. There is a spot i have found on the male body that can give him the feeling that women get when they are experiencing an orgasm. Bellow the stomach close to the hip bone use your tongue and lick jently, don't stop and he will experience the most devine feeling ever he will have no controll over anything not even to stop u. This i call the male orgasm.


Change Your Dating Reality

I want to share with you the key to finding the Right One and getting married the quickest way possible -- guaranteed.

It's not hard, doesn't cost any money, and takes only about one minute a day. You already have all the tools you need to make it happen, you just need to apply this for one minute every day.

What will guarantee that you find the Right One and get married the quickest way possible? A key ingredient is to believe in yourself, and I am going to show you why it works, and how to do it the right way.

The word "manifest" means to turn a thought into a thing. Everything you see around you -- cars, houses, the table, a pen -- were all once thoughts that someone turned into a real object. When you manifest something, you make it appear in the real world. Now as a single person, you have an idea that you want to get married, and what you want to do is manifest that idea into reality, to be standing under the marriage canopy.

A key underlying force that allows you to manifest an idea into reality is to believe you can do it. We can all relate to times where the situation looked bad, but through sheer will and determination people beat insurmountable odds.

Consider a life-and-death scenario of being out in the wilderness alone. Gordon Smith, an instructor who spent 26 years in the U.S. Army's Special Forces, says: "If you have a guy with all the survival training in the world who has a negative attitude, and a guy who doesn't have a clue but has a positive attitude, I guarantee you that the one with the positive attitude is coming out of the woods alive. Simple as that." http://www.fastcompany.com/magazine/69/fighttosurvive.html

This heightened motivation of people in dire situations appears to be the force that gets them through. But that's not the whole story. The amazing thing is what happens behind the scenes, the real secret to success. There is a stronger metaphysical component at work here.

Remember the Six Day War and the Yom Kippur War? The tiny State of Israel was surrounded by hostile Arab countries numbering over 200 million people. What happened? The Arab countries should have wiped Israel off the map in short order. Instead, Israel beat them all. Miracle!

We call it a miracle when we see a dramatic change in reality. In those wars we see an obvious change of reality -- how God changed a pending defeat into complete victory.

On a smaller scale, you can use the same principle to guarantee that you will get married quickly. Let's explain:

When you believe in something, the sheer force of your will can give God reason to support your goal. Based on your belief, God actually changes reality to make the thing that you want come about. For example: You want to get married, and if you believe with total conviction that you will find the Right One, then God can take your will and actually change reality to cause your soul mate to come to you.

Let's look at the source of this idea, a story in the Talmud (Taanit 8a) about "The Weasel and the Pit." In the story, a young man promised to marry a certain woman. She asked: "Who will be the witness to this pledge?" The only things in the area at the time were a pit, and a weasel walking by. With no other option and in all sincerity, the young man said that the weasel and the pit should be the witnesses.

Time went by, and the young man forgot his pledge. Then he began experiencing serious hardships -- each time involving a weasel or a pit. In the end, he realized why these things were happening, and resolved to keep his pledge. He married the woman, and the misfortunes stopped.

Rabbi Chaim Shmulevitz gives insight on how this works. Obviously, the weasel and the pit have extremely limited powers. Yet when the young man initially designated them to be his witnesses, God took his sincerity into account and actually changed the reality to give the weasel and the pit the ability to uphold the promise.

The same principle is true for you. If you really believe in something, God may change reality so that it comes about.

However, this powerful idea is a double-edged sword. Just as it can work to your benefit, it can be to your detriment by bringing about something that is bad for you. Let's say you meet a really great person on a date, and decide that you absolutely, positively must marry this person.

In reality, though, you may be temporarily infatuated with this person, and in fact they are really bad for you -- and marrying them will be a disaster. Yet if you will it hard enough, and are over-insistent, it is possible that God will allow you to marry that wrong person.

That's why, when you are dating, you should always ask God to help you marry the "right person" and not any specific person.

To summarize, there are two ways you can use this principle positively:

1) Believe in yourself.

If you truly believe that you will find the Right One and get married, then God can change the reality to make it happen.

2) Ask God to bring you the Right One.

The key here is to ask for "the Right One," and not "that one."

On a practical level, you need to make your belief real, by manifesting this idea -- everyday, once a day, for one minute.

Here's how to do it:

1) Say out loud: "I am ready to get married now. I am ready to meet him/her today. I am committed to being a giver in the relationship, rather than a taker."

2) Make one small effort to find them: Check for the newest members on a dating website. Call a matchmaker. Signup for a Speed Dating event. Call a friend and tell them what you are looking for.

Small, consistent steps is the key to success. "By the inch it's a cinch, by the yard it's hard." Meaning, if you take one small action every day, your small efforts turn out to be significant over time. You don't need to work hard, just be consistent.

The more consistent you are, the more you reinforce your belief. By saying positive statements and making small efforts, you send a bigger message to God, who can make it happen.

One of my mom's favorite sayings is, "Think big, be big." And it is very true.

"Think marriage, get married."

Staying in Touch With Your Partner With Virtual Reality Sex Toy

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Should Women Fake It?

Learning how to establish a healthy sexual relationship.
(Black Leather Couch Tales)

As soon as Chelsea walked in, she plopped down on the couch and announced, “I am so frustrated.”

“Hello Chelsea,” I said.

Ignoring my greeting altogether, she continued, “No really, Coach, I am.”

A few months earlier, Chelsea, a successful, attractive and very fit thirty-something lawyer, had been involved in a serious quest for a good, long-term relationship. She was in my office explaining how hard it had been to find a man of similar goals and values given her busy lifestyle. I had encouraged her to try online dating. I pointed out that it would be an effective method of connecting with a large number of men that fit her criteria, in the shortest amount of time, with minimal effort.

“Chelsea, please explain,” I replied, taking to her cue to skip the formalities and get right to the point.

“I really did it," she continued, "I changed my pattern, followed your steps, went online and approached my search with a new set of guidelines. I can tell you, it worked! I found the right guy.”

“And…?”

“Well, Ben is a wonderful man. He’s everything I could have hoped for. We have fun together and can agree on just about everything. He’s already my best friend. I even waited this time and didn’t rush into sex.”

She hesitated. I waited for her to continue.

”That’s where the problem comes up, Coach. I don’t know what to do. Like I said, I’m frustrated...the sex is not so good. It’s terrible because everything else about our relationship is perfect. I can truly see us building a happy life together.” Then, after a pensive pause, “I’m thinking maybe I should just fake it. The sex should get better, right? Isn’t it ok to fake it for now?”

Chelsea is one of countless women who resort to “faking it” to fool their partners into believing they enjoy lovemaking when they actually do not. Why do so many women feel they have to pretend to enjoy sex instead of actually being able to enjoy it?

Some women simply don’t have orgasms and they feel insecure about it. This is usually the result of growing up with a feeling of shame and guilt about sexuality. From a very young age, girls are sent pretty clear messages that discourage them from expressing and/or fully exploring this aspect of themselves. Consequently, many women have to learn that it is good to get in touch with their bodies on an intimate level and learn how to be turned on. Only then can true sexual enjoyment be experienced.

Men contribute to this problem with their own insecurity and lack of a basic understanding of how women function sexually. Since so many men measure their very degree of “maleness” by their sexual prowess, it has become well established that giving a woman an orgasm is a defining element in what we call manhood. The problem is that when a woman cares enough about a man to become intimate with him, she usually cares enough about his ego to feel incredible pressure to make him believe she thoroughly enjoys sex with him. Some woman experiencing the need to please a man’s ego report faking orgasms “just to end the incessant pounding.”

Men should understand that every sexual encounter will not lead to her having an orgasm, and that it is ok. Not having an orgasm does not mean she did not find the experience pleasurable. Relieving her of this pressure will allow her to become more relaxed and more receptive, thus leading to more orgasms!

I know most men would never admit it publicly, but many could benefit from learning more about how to please women. It is probably a good idea to start by letting go of the notion that the only way a woman can be stimulated to a climax is by way of intercourse. In fact, only about 30% of women can experience orgasm with intercourse alone. That leaves a staggering majority of women who require other forms of stimulation.

I could go on in great detail about this particular issue because it is truly at the heart of so many of these problems. Chelsea’s problems were rooted elsewhere.

Based on her own accounts, Chelsea placed too heavy an importance on creating the “perfect” relationship. She went on and on about what a perfect match she and Ben were. By wanting something so much can create fear and anxiety not allowing you to relax. Nonetheless, Chelsea’s attention became so focused on how perfect their lovemaking should be, that her own natural ability to enjoy the exquisite pleasures of intimacy was severely hampered. To Chelsea, any problem that could taint this otherwise perfect relationship had to be squelched by a quick solution: Fake orgasms. Problem solved. Forgetting that a long-term relationship needs to be built on a solid foundation.

In his 1996 book, Contemporary Interpersonal Theory and Research, Donald Kiesler provided us with a behavior concordance model which explains the Interpersonal Reflex Principle. This basically states that much of our interpersonal behavior is designed to elicit predictable responses from those with whom we interact. These actions put into motion a cycle where one’s behavior is constantly confirming, recognizing, validating and influencing the behavior of others. Sounds complicated but it is not. In essence we are training people what we like and don’t like.

A dog, for example, repeats good behavior rewarded. However, if you reward a dog for unwanted behavior like begging at the table, the dog will repeat that behavior and always beg. To fake an orgasm is to confirm to your partner that what they were doing was good. This creates a positive feeling in your partner and they will do more of the same. Unlike the dog, training your partner to perform this trick will not leave you begging for more.

Trying to break the cycle will confuse your partner creating doubt. Your partner will lose confidence and never know when to trust you, is he pleasing you or not? When this happens sex will only get worse and the relationship strained.

“To answer the question should women fake it? No! Never fake it.”

Problems, as much as we would like them to, do not just go away. The longer you go without confronting and handling them, the bigger they become. Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the leading causes of couples splitting up. The number one reason for sexual dissatisfaction is lack of communication. Forgoing communication and opting to simply fake it will only widen the gap between you two and ultimately ruin the relationship.

It is vital that you develop a level of communication with your partner that allows for frank and honest about sex talk. But, how do you tell your partner what turns you on? First set the ground rules between yourselves that sex talk is healthy, fun and in no way to be taken in an offensive manner, then:

Talk during sex. Don’t be afraid of hurting your partner’s ego by taking the time to teach them what brings you the most pleasure. Men in particular are very eager and happy students in this area. Just relax. It is ok to ask, “Do you like this?” or “How does this feel?” By all means, if you are asked such questions, be honest with your answers: “Yes, that feels good.” or, “I liked it when you did this instead” and, “It really turns me on when you do this.” Never ask after sex, “Was it good?” I can tell you that no one likes to be asked this question. File it under the same category as “Do I look fat in this?”

Talk about sex when you are not having sex. Ask questions and keep learning more about each other. Tell each other your fantasies and be willing to explore them, within reason. Opening and maintaining these communication lines will make you both more comfortable about the subject. Talking can also serve to build excitement as prolonged foreplay.

Buy books and explore together. Here is another peculiar aspect. We want sex, think about sex and are bombarded with it all over television, movies and advertisements. Oddly, very few of us study anything about it. A man will invest an exorbitant amount of time learning the parts of an engine or memorizing sports stats, but spends zero time learning about the female orgasm. Both women and men should take every opportunity to become students of sex together. Not only is it very sexy to learn together, you will both benefit from it greatly in the long run.

If you are in a relationship, starting a new one, or looking to get into one, learn that ultimately communication is the key to building a healthy and enjoyable sex life together. Let us do away with this notion that it is somehow wrong or shameful to talk openly about sex or that you can offend each other. I find it interesting that couples can be intimate with each other, yet feel uncomfortable discussing the intimacy. So, talk, learn, teach and, most importantly, have fun!

The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women Now Available in Paperback:

Marc H. Rudov, author of The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women: How to Succeed in Romance on Planet Earth (TM) (ISBN 0-9745017-1-9), announced today that his popular book is now available in paperback and ready for worldwide shipments. Formerly, it was available in eBook format. In addition, Rudov announced the endorsement of Susan Shapiro Barash, a distinguished, New York City-based professor and author of books about women’s issues. Readers can learn about and purchase The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women at: http://TheMansNoNonsenseGuideToWomen.com.

Los Gatos, CA (PRWEB) April 5, 2004 -- Marc H. Rudov, author of The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women: How to Succeed in Romance on Planet Earth (TM) (ISBN 0-9745017-1-9), announced today that his popular book is now available in paperback and ready for worldwide shipments. Formerly, it was available in eBook format. In addition, Rudov announced the endorsement of Susan Shapiro Barash, a distinguished, New York City-based professor and author of books about women’s issues. Readers can learn about and purchase The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women at
“I am pleased at the response of readers to this groundbreaking book and happy to have endorsements from noteworthy professionals like Susan Shapiro Barash. Susan’s endorsement is a powerful testimonial to the message and principles of my book. I have received orders and invitations to book signings from the major book chains, and will be announcing more about this in the coming weeks,” said Author Rudov. “Despite writing this book for men about women, I am continuously amazed at the demand from women, who want to learn more about how men perceive them. And, now that the paperback is available, more men and women can discover the secrets of getting along with each other in the modern era,” continued Rudov.

Susan Shapiro Barash endorsed The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women by saying: "In this timely book, Marc Rudov has uniquely captured the essential ingredients of success between men and women, and has expressed them in a lucid, entertaining manner." Barash, an established writer of nonfiction women's issue books, has appeared across the USA on television and radio programs. She is a professor of Critical Thinking/Gender Studies at Marymount Manhattan College and a member of the Women's Leadership Board at the John F. Kennedy School of Government at Harvard University, where she mentors graduate students.

Contrary to popular belief, Author Rudov maintains that men and women are from the same planet but, unfortunately, have been socialized differently and programmed for conflict. He counsels men that the only way to succeed with women is to remove their layers of socialized behavior and find women who have done, or are willing to do, likewise. The Man's No-Nonsense Guide to Women: How to Succeed in Romance on Planet Earth,  teaches them how. Both men and women have been buying the book and validating its principles.

The book’s Website also contains a helpful advice column for men and women, Dear No-Nonsense Advisor, as well as Rudov’s articles, radio interviews, and scheduled events.

About the Author

Marc H. Rudov, an investment banker and business consultant residing in Silicon Valley, California, received his formal education in engineering and business. He obtained his vast informal training in relationships with women through over a decade in the dating world after his divorce. In addition to his book, Mr. Rudov wrote the articles “The Golden Rule Dictates Your Sex Life” and “Five Myths About Women.”

“How to Succeed in Romance on Planet Earth” and “Life with her needn’t be an endless game of chess” are trademarks of MHR Enterprises.

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